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Chemo #2, Cycle 1

Well, we’re back and kicking it old school now people, cause it’s chemo time again. As has become old hat for me, my scans from a few weeks ago came back and shockingly enough they brought both good news and bad news. Now, I’m not sure how much I trust these scans cause I got them at, let’s call it the ghetto location, and I’ll tell ya what, that place is absolute goddamn anarchy. Last time I went there they asked if I could bring my own Heparin, which is a wild request because how the fuck would I have my own supply of Heparin? Would be like if you were having oral surgery and the dentist asked you to bring your own laughing gas. Just a crazy ask. Well, this time I went there and after I got interrogated by the wicked Asian IV nurse who couldn’t speak English and wanted me to explain what cancer is to her, they told me I was too tall to get a CT scan? I was a bit surprised, as I’m barely 6’2 if I haven’t shaved my dome in a month, and this was going to be my roughly 8 millionth CT scan of my young career, so I admittedly had my doubts with this new conundrum of ours. Long story short, I got the scans and it took forever and this probably was more of a “you had to be there” story but I’m bored and felt like telling it anyways so you can all just suck it cause you can’t unread it now. So there. Never a simple day in the cancer world, let me tell ya. Anyways, what I was originally gonna say was that the scans came back and the tumors in my chest are still growing so I’m done with that weirdo RNA injection clinical trial I’ve been on and it can go sit on a traffic cone cause I’m sick of its shit. It was the absolute worst. It sucked the life out of me, made it so I couldn’t drink beer (had to become a rum and coke guy like an absolute loony tune), put a strain on my work, my relationships, my everyday life, and then didn’t even work. Real kick in the nuts. But, now you can all join me in telling that trial to go blow an elephant cause we’re on to the next one and oh boy is this one a doozy! In fact, it’s such a doozy that it isn’t even a clinical trial! It’s, like, a legit drug that people besides me are on! So shout out to my main man, the tumor terminator himself, Doctor Dizzy-fo-shizzy Chizzy for coming out of the absolute clouds with this one. It’s called¬†Adriamycin and it seems like it’s pretty dope. He told me about it last Thursday and I got it that afternoon so here’s my breakdown of it so far:

  • Energy levels are already up, chest pain and shortness-of-breath are down (at least in my head they are)
  • No diarrhea yet, but the ol stool has been looser than a cheerleader on her prom night after a couple sips of Raspberry Rubinoff
  • Appetite is coming back in a big-ish way
  • Did have an allergic reaction to one of the pre-meds which is a bummer since I’ve never had a reaction to any meds before but we’ll persevere

That’s about it at this point. If it’s not obvious, I’m pretty excited about this new drug regimen and have pretty high hopes for it working out. Obviously, that’s a dangerous optimism to have as nothing with cancer is ever that simple but I honestly had so little faith in that last trial that it feels nice to at least have some hope and even a smidge of energy to latch onto again. That’s all I got people, be good til next time.

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