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Not Really Sure What To Call This Post if We’re Being Honest

That’s right, ya boi is back and typing out some news and jokes, just oh so painfully slowly. Like, my words per minute last week was like 75, and this week it might be like 3. Kinda like how my speech should be. So many of you may be wondering why you are being graced with my literary presence so soon after my last visit, and the answer is not a simple one. So, we got to the bottom of my side effects from last blog, and honestly it makes perfect sense. So I was (am) being plagued with numbness in my right hand, face, and mouth, I had blurry vision and dizziness, and I had trouble swallowing. So I was talking about how these issues were due to my treatment because logic would say that if I’m dumping a foreign substance into my body, my weird feelings would probably be due to that substance. BUT, if you were to be unaware of my treatment and knew only of my symptoms, what would you guess would be the problem? An overactive immune system? Probably not. If you’re not sure where I’ going with this, I’ll just give you the answer: it’s a brain tumor!!! Yaaaayyyyy!!! I haven’t named it yet, but I’m thinking Brian the Brainy. Still work shopping it. Anywho, this is obviously a real problem, as I’m fairly certain the brain isn’t something that can be easily operated on like an arm or a butthole. So I got the news yesterday that I have it, and I’ve been a real mess of emotions since then. On one hand, I’m happy to know what’s wrong and that if it’s removed I’ll feel normal again (I assume), but also sad and a little scared cause if this is unsuccessful, it really could be the end of me. Not that I would ever go down without a fight, but I assume the next step after this is hospice, which obviously is not an ideal place for a 23-year-old. So I’m floating along right now, not going to work (no one has responded to my emails whether that’s cool or not so I may be unemployed but I sure as shit don’t care), chillin at the squid tank, getting mentally prepared for whatever is ahead so that when Dr. D Money Magic calls to give me the plan, I’ll be ready to move forward and give it all that I’ve got. Right now it seems they are deciding between radiation and surgery to remove it, and I don’t really care which they choose.  So yeah, that’s where I’m at, I’ll update again once I hear the plan but just waiting around right now. I would write more but to be honest it’s kinda hard to think right now and this has taken forever to type since my hand doesn’t work, both likely due to the growing mass in my thinking brain. But hey, let’s focus on the positives. If it works, my brain will work again (not that it ever did in the first place), I’ll feel normal-ish, I can refocus on my other tumors, the ladies will be absolutely SOAKED with how impressive I am, and hey, it’s beautiful day out there people, so go live it up cause ya just never know when you’ll get a brain tumor! Now if you’ll excuse me, I’m gonna go take an anxiety pill and drink a beer like it’s 2013 and get tuuurrrnnntttttt!!! Kidding. But maybe not really. We’ll see how bored I get today.

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